So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize