This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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