I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
she pinky promised me she was 18
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize