'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
