Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
In America we eat man semen.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
as a side note pls kill me
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
