was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
