All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
