but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Randomize
