Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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