Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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