Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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