Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
