: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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