Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
