Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
