If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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