I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
