it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
