Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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