i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize