His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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