So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
