I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
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