I bet he comes in French.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize