Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize