I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
