I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I was not drunk enough for that final.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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