I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
