I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
