Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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