I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
