I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
try to milk me bitch
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
