It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
