We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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