Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize