they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
