I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
