I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
