Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Randomize
