dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
