party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Randomize
