i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
