Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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