No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Randomize
