My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
