yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
