May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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