Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize