Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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