i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Two words: nipple clamps
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