i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
